My Ephiany

 On an October day I parked my car in front of the high school and as I waited for my son who would have conferences the next day I observed the following 


Approximately nine yellow school buses were parked in front and they were being loaded by high school juniors and seniors decked out in Halloween costumes some of these kids clearly had down syndrome some of these kids were in wheelchairs some of these kids were most likely blind because they had seeing devices and some of them were an unidentifiable disability to me as having disabilities. Clearly this was a gathering of specially abled children there were many adults near the children some of the adults or actually guiding the children and following them to the destination. Some children were more independent and could walk and talk and get on the bus all by themselves most of them were independent thinkers and independent doers I did not see a lot of interaction between peers as I have witnessed other high school students. But there was a lot of smiles and happiness and costume shares as I saw snow white Darth Vader superman Pinocchio peter pan a police officer a sheriff a princess a B and many other recognizable characters for Halloween


This is when I had my epiphany


Clearly each of the students had an IEP and we're under the guidance in care of special-education teachers just like my son Carson.


CAPS


ACTION FIGURES. Independent. Focused persistent. Alone  child-like


Other projects: collaborative. Mature. Adult concepts effective. Creative. Group effort. 


Am I the problem? 

"WE" survived!!

One principle learned in Cognitive Behavior Therapy is think with the "end in mind."

It worked ... sort of ...

 
8 am on Saturday and my OCD/ADD/Tourette's 18-year-old is safe in his bed sleeping. He fell asleep most likely around 3 am (I was snoozing, but barely) after watching a movie at a female friend's house. He and his Prom date, whom drove 3 hours away to attend the dance, finally landed at this safe spot. (Coincidentally his date arranged to sleep-over at this spot before driving the 3 hours home the next morning.) After being rejected from 4 friend's "after Prom parties", the couple lamented on how to spend the rest of their "magical" prom night while sitting in a mini van in my driveway ! The clock read 11:00 pm.

Another Mom's lamented experience with "Normal"

These writings, discovered in my FB feed, reflect my son and my families experiences, thoughts and principles learned over 15 years of parenting a LD child.





13 REASONS WHY: My PERSPECTIVE


Spring events 2017:
(my personal opinions are based on my own sphere of influence and experiences. I am not a professional nor do I have science-based evidence)
My husband is a pediatric hospitalist and IF a teen attempted suicide and failed, the teen would see an ER doc, be admitted, and be treated by a pediatric hospitalist to stabilize vital organs.
Mental health professionals, who are available during the hospital stay, also begin taking histories. A lot of emotional & physical work is involved.

Senior Awards Ceremony: my perspective

--3 celebrations including Honors Awards Assembly, Class Day, & "Graduation"
--Same 50 names read, cheered for, paraded on stage for all attendees to honor
--Because my graduate got a 33 on the ACT, he was amongst a group of 75 celebrated, but their names were not read
--Unfortunately, during the Honors ceremony, the moderator accidentally "SKIPPED" this elect group to stand
--Nobody NOTICED--NOBODY really cared how much effort was offered for this accomplishment
--Ironically, my son's seemingly "best friend" from elementary school sat in front of us. This kid has visibly not understood my son since he began ticking in 4th grade and their friendship lessened.  I witnessed my son congratulate him during this ceremony for his many awards and the student nodded his head and moved onto other friends.
--Even though the mother & father of this boy and I about 10 years ago used to be neighbors and had several deep conversations, the mother and I have barely interacted during the handful of events we were both present at.  I gave up a few years ago even engaging in conversation with her as it became too painful as our common interest was no longer a "friendship."
--I don't blame or hold grudges; simply need to save my emotional energy for supporting my son and my own family
--Prior to attending the Honors Award Ceremony, I repeated the words "Don't OVER EXAGERRATE--"Don't OVER EXAGERRATE--"Don't OVER EXAGERRATE--"Don't OVER EXAGERRATE--
--Only 45 minutes of witnessing the SAME group of kids receiving HIGH ACADEMIC awards wasn't torture, but provided a feeling of great HOPE for the future
--We celebrated my graduate at a yummy GELATO restaurant PACIUGO

 

*My husband is not pictured. 4 night shifts and the current atmosphere at the hospital has left him "photogenically" deprived!!!

Opinion: Lifted from COMMENT section

I DID NOT WRITE THIS, but found it in a comment section. I wanted to re-read this so I copied and pasted here: It is a valid perspective and I am not trying to plagiarize, simply COMMUNICATE!  Forgive me if someone takes offense.
(I do not know the author)

"I first and foremost want to say I am by no means a professional or have any kind of formal education on psychology in any and/all its subcategories. 

This series doesn't "clearly"  communicatie anything. I want to make this abondently clear because this series, or anything else for that matter, doesn't "clearly" communicate anything. 

If it did "clearly" communicate something , then there wouldn't be any sort of debate or disturbance like there is because it would be obvious. 

Tourette Association of America: Carson presents to 200 elementary-aged- kids

Here is a link to videos of Carson's presentation inspired by the Tourette Association of America

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/jzJ77y1UhdM?list=PLj_jpj9lBobpdF8i4u3w6SO9Mj1SItM_J" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>


<iframe width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/jzJ77y1UhdM?list=PLj_jpj9lBobpdF8i4u3w6SO9Mj1SItM_J" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Emotional decisions for the entire family



My oldest son graduated from College TODAY. I had a ticket purchased, but felt so strongly that I needed to stay home to support my 17-yr-old third son. So at midnight the night before my flight, my husband booked a ticket for my 10-yr-old daughter as we could not just have her go "as me!" It ended costing us $1,100 for the 2 of them to go. I am so grateful we had the means to do this. As much as I would of loved to be at the commencement ceremony celebrating, I am so at peace with this decision. 

BUT it also gets worse......

I am nearly emotionally spent parenting my third son. Tourette's and ADD in 3rd grade and clinically diagnosed with OCD last year, his public education has been extremely time-consuming for him and me--he is a junior in high school and got a 33 on the ACT, but I stayed home because he is failing 2 classes and his IEP and special ED teachers and other teachers are just as confused as us with his symptoms:  behavior vs. brain chemistry. I don't want to even imagine him trying to take these classes again and going through the OCD heart ache! 

I have been with him through Habit Reversal Therapy, Cognitive Behavior Therapy, and OCD/ACT and know that I learned more than him!!!!

WHEN will he begin to embrace these therapies and acknowledge help from others????

PS My husband used the Periscope APP  to video the 2-hour LIVE event so I was "virtually" there.

Rally for Tourette in Washington DC

#Rally4Tourette
#TouretteConf16

My 17-year-old son and I flew to DC for a 2-day Youth Ambassador training for the Tourette Association. We stayed in the Alexandria, VA Crystal Gateway Marriott.

My son and I got to share our personal stories with 2 KS senators legislative AIDS and 1 Congresdional legislative aid!



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